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“The greatest gift I ever had came from God, and I call him Dad!” – Anonymous

“Noble fathers have noble children.” – Euripedes

“Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father!”  -  Lydia M. Child

“Watching your husband become a father is really sexy and wonderful” – Cindy Crawford

“Sometimes the poorest man leaves his children the richest inheritance.” – Ruth E. Renkel

“If the relationship of father to son could really be reduced to biology, the whole earth would blaze with the glory of fathers and sons.” – James Baldwin

“It is a wise father that knows his own child.” – Shakespeare

“Any man can be a father, but it takes a special person to be a Dad.” – Proverb

“We think our fathers fools, so wise we grow. Our wiser sons, no doubt will think us so.”- Alexander Pope

“One father is more than a hundred school masters.” -George Herbert

“I cannot think of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father’s protection.”- Sigmund Freud

One not so famous quote

“The best dads are those who don’t say they are ‘baby sitting’ when their wives are away.” – Debbie Glade

Happy Fathers Day!

Smart Poodle loves kids, and kids love to go to summer camp. Parents always have so many questions about camp, and there’s no better place to get the answers than from the experts at one of America’s best-loved summer camps – French Woods. Today we are interviewing Camp Staff Director Beth Schaefer and her husband, Marketing Director Michael Knauf, also head of the Video, Computer, and Visual Arts Departments. 

French Woods is an extraordinary performing arts camp for kids ages 7 to 17. It is located in beautiful Hancock , NY, with an office in Coral Springs, FL.

A bird’s-eye view of the sprawling acreage of French Woods Camp

Many parents are apprehensive about sending their children to sleep-away camp. What advice do you have for them?

(Beth) Leaving home for the first time can be difficult. Whether you are seven and heading away to summer camp or if you are eighteen and heading off to college. Personally, having grown up at my Dad’s summer camp and never truly learning to be on my own, I was terrified to leave home for school and put off truly heading out on my own until I was over twenty one! I would want my own child to have the confidence to learn that self-reliance at in a safe environment like a summer camp. The earlier you start, the easier it can be!

(Michael) The biggest problems we have with kids making the adjustment to being away from home, comes from the parents, not the children. To make it easiest for your child, talk to the camp staff for advice before they come to camp, and work with them to help your child have a successful experience. The kids have a support network built into camp, the parents do not — don’t let the fact that you miss your child make it harder on them to make the adjustment.

Camp Staff Director, Beth Schaefer, enjoying horseback riding

What is important for parents to consider when choosing a camp?

(Beth) Families look at different things when choosing a program. Some look for a traditional or religious camp, while others look for specialty programs. Many specialty camps are fairly pinpointed in nature, offering only one type of program. Make certain that the program your child is looking at offers enough diversity to keep your child’s interest during the duration of their stay while focusing on the lessons you wish to teach.

(Michael) Consider your child’s interests first. If they hate sports, sending them to a baseball camp may not be good for them. One camp can be very different than the next in the programs offered, the general atmosphere, and the amount of flexibility they offer each child. Some kids will do very well in a traditional program, some will do better in a specialty program, and some will do best in a program like French Woods, which offers individual choice. I highly recommend visiting the camp while it is in session, to get a feel for the place.

Is there a way for parents to accurately check out a camp’s reputation so they can feel comfortable that their kids are in good hands?

(Beth) The primary camping association is the American Camping Association. This nation wide organization requires camps to adhere to strict standards of procedures, policies and practices. Visit the camp while in session and speak to the director. Perhaps the most valuable tool, however, is to speak to a family who has been to the camp and discuss their experience.

(Michael)

You can also use internet opinion sites like epinions.com or campratingz.com, but like everything on the internet, these sites are often abused… if you ignore the best and worst ratings, you’ll likely get a pretty fair impression.

What do you do to appease homesick campers?

(Beth)At French Woods, we know that every child experiences home sickness in their own way and we try to give them the special attention they need to be successful during their summer at camp.

(Michael) As a basic philosophy, we think that it’s much better for a child to make it through the summer, rather than to give up after a little difficulty. To support that we will do anything required to help a child through homesickness. It is important to realize that it is very normal and happens to nearly every child to some degree or another. We find that the best response to homesickness is to give the child extra attention and to keep them busy, something that we can do very well at French Woods because of our high counselor-to-camper ratio and our wide range of activities.

When camp is not in session, husband and wife team, Michael and Beth travel the globe recruiting camp staff members (Lima, Peru)

When should I start thinking about registering for French Woods?

(Beth)The best time to register for camp is prior to September 15^th so that you can benefit from our early registration discounts. Our middle two sessions begin to close around January and the first and fourth follow suit shortly thereafter.

(Michael) You should start thinking about camp in general for your child when you think they would benefit from it, for some children that’s as early as 7 years old, for some it’s later. The benefits of camp include developing individuality and independence.

How many campers do you have at French Woods?

(Beth) Depends on the session – session one is deliberately kept small at about 250 campers. Sessions two through four run at up to 650 campers.

(Michael) That makes French Woods a large camp, but there are benefits to size, among them a very rich program offering and a great diversity of campers and staff.

Spacious cabins at French Woods

How many counselors do you have?

(Beth) Our full staff will run at over 400 and each cabin is made up of 10-12 campers with a minimum of 3 counselors.

(Michael) French Woods is unique in that almost all of our counselors are qualified to teach in a specialty area, so the cabin counselors may be musicians, or coaches, or artists. We find that this encourages kids to try new activities that they might not otherwise be exposed to. It also allows us to attract terrific staff, because they also are at camp to do the things they love, their enthusiasm spills over to the kids, too.

Where do the staff members come from?

(Beth) We have staff from all over the world. We look for college students who are studying within their area of specialty and for teachers and professionals who function as senior teachers and counselors.

(Michael) Last summer we had counselors and campers from more than 46 countries.

What types of concentrations do you offer for campers?

(Beth) While French Woods is known for our arts programs in theater, music, dance, circus and visual arts, our individual choice program also offers magic, waterfront, sports, horseback riding and skate park. Every child at camp is welcome to participate in all areas of program regardless of their primary concentration.

(Michael) Our program is unique; each camper works with our staff to design their own individual program, made up from the more than 90 activities we offer. Kids that are serious about dance, can take dance classes all day long, kids that are mad for theater can spend all their time doing theater. We have kids that focus on one area of activity, and kids that dabble in a wide variety of different activities; it all depends on the child. We even allow the parents to have input on the process, and to suggest activities that we should encourage the child to try.

“We love camp! The camaraderie among the kids is awesome!” says Michael

Can you describe for us what putting on a full theater production at camp entails from audition to performance?

(Beth) Because children do not audition to be accepted to French Woods, they go through a placement process when they arrive at camp. Within theater, the kids do a basic audition for every show they are eligible for by age in a mass audition for the directors. They can sing something as simple as Happy Birthday or come with a prepared audition piece - we provide the accompanist. Dancers, musicians and kids interested in circus will go through a low pressure placement too.

Later in the day individual theater directors will ask kids they need to see again to return for a “call back” where they might sing or act from the show they are directing. That evening, the theater director meet cast all the shows. We make sure that each child is cast in the best roll available to them. Every child who auditions for a musical is cast in a show.

Shows rehearse for two to three hours each day for two and a half weeks. Musicals have rehearsals with full pit orchestras and the sets, costumes and props are prepared for each show. During our final weekend of each session, we invite parents and friends to come visit so they can see the final performances in each of our five theaters in repertory style. What the kids produce is incredible. Every summer I am impressed by the talent of the kids at camp.

(Michael) The theater department is supported by the music department, which provides orchestras for the musical theater productions – also made up of campers and staff, the costume department, the tech theater sound and lighting departments, the dance department (for choreography) the props department, and the stagecraft department, for sets. Campers are involved in every area and the support from every area helps the productions really come together and feel professional. There’s also opportunities for kids who don’t want to be on stage: to design costumes, to run sound and lighting boards, to move set pieces, or to play music for the shows.

That sounds like a lot of fun! It sounds like you have many talented campers and counselors. Do you have campers who return year after year?

(Beth) Of course! We also have kids who find us late in their teens who many times stay on as counselors.

French Woods production of the musical, Chicago

It must be sad when they are too old to return as campers.

(Michael) It is, but a surprising number stay in touch, and seeing kids build on the foundations they start at French Woods is very rewarding… this year, Beth and I have seen 8 or 10 current and former campers on Broadway, and that doesn’t mention the ones that go on to be fashion designers, or rock stars, or teachers, or writers…

What is your favorite part of being in camp yourself?

(Beth) The joy. Whether that it is the moment the kids see their friends who they haven’t seen since last summer, the thunderous applause of opening night, or watching a child discover that they are truly good at something, camp is about kids finding their joy; Helping kids do that is why we do what we do.

(Michael) Seeing the way the kids support one another. The camaraderie is awesome.

Beth and Michael, thank you for all this great insight. You have made summer camp sound like such an enriching experience for our children, and you have helped to ease parents apprehension. I wish I were a kid again!

To learn more about French Woods Camp, click here. Or call 845-887-5600.

A great place to start is by watching the video. The website is spectacular, and once you read about the extensive activites available to please every camper, you’ll understand why so many children return again and again, year after year.

Motherhood is by far the biggest privilege I have ever had. Yesterday – Mother’s Day – got me thinking about what kind of mom and person I am. There’s some good in there, but there’s always room for improvement.

Me and Rachel

I have always believed that life’s best lessons are learned by both the good and not so wonderful traits of those in our lives along with the positive and negative experiences we have. Sometimes the best way to improve ourselves is to reflect upon the mistakes our parents (or others important to us in our lives) made with us, even though their intentions were good. That way we can be sure (negative) history will not repeat itself.

The same is true for positive traits. We look to our parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles as teachers and role models. We can choose to practice in our own lives, the traits we respect about each of them – especially if we take the time to make a conscious effort.

When I visit schools, I tell middle school students that everyone from every background will experience challenges and hardships in their lives. It is easy to blame our parents, other family members or unfortunate events for our personal failures. But what does that accomplish?  We are in control of our actions and thoughts. Though we do not always realize it, on our own we can choose to be giving or selfish, kind or cruel, complimentary or critical, motivated or lazy, curious or indifferent, positive or negative, grateful or unappreciative and good humored or angry.

What positive traits of yours do you see in your children? What do you hope they’d do differently than you did? What choices have you made in your life that you’d like to change for your own personal growth?

It is cliché to say “No one is perfect,” but it’s important to remind ourselves of that. There’s nothing wrong with celebrating the good and working to improve the not-so-good in ourselves.  It will make us better parents and happier people.

Click here to check out my latest article on Self Growth.com.

Courtesy Ace-Clipart.com

Tonia McAllister from All American Mommy is a Mega Mommy Blogger Powerhouse and a true inspiration. Like many other Mommy Bloggers, Tonia reviews products that benefit children and families. But Tonia has a unique mission. She supports companies that give back to their communities and is an advocate for charities. We all admire that!

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Tonia has been kind enough to take the time to answer some interview questions. . .

Please describe your blog for us, and tell us about your readers.

All American Mommy is a blog that provides tips and advice for moms and women, along with product reviews and fun giveaways. It’s also a vehicle for sharing information on great charities and companies that help support them. I feel strongly compelled to help promote WAHMs (Work at Home Moms) and companies that support charities. After all, if we buy from these companies we are also helping the charities that they support. My readers are moms and women of all age groups. I have readers in the US, Canada and parts of Europe. Many of these women have become great friends of mine.

What attracted you to blogging in the first place?

Actually, there were many things. A good friend of mine had been blogging for over a year, and she was really enjoying it. I knew that I wanted to start a blog that could help benefit others. All American Mommy was born and I’ve been addicted to blogging ever since. Yes, I am an addict, and I don’t want an intervention! I am also hopeful that through my blog and networking, I may someday have the opportunity for a career in what I like doing best – helping others.

How long have you been doing this?

I started in September 2008 with my feet running before they even hit the ground.

What do you like best about blogging?

I have met some incredible women through the site, and I love sharing my opinions and things or products that I feel strongly about. I love being able to contribute positively considering that the rest of our world can be so negative.

What skills have you developed just from blogging?

One thing is for sure – my communication skills have vastly improved. I have always been a good communicator, especially when dealing with customers in my current and past jobs. But being exposed to the world via the web is different. You’ve got to be able to get your point across so everyone can understand and appreciate it. If not, you will not retain your readers. In addition to writing, I’ve learned more about the technical aspects of managing a blog than I ever thought possible. Networking is a skill in itself, and there’s no better way to meet talented, generous people than by blogging. There’s always so much more to learn, but it’s exciting.

Is All American Mommy a full time job for you?

Oh, how I wish it were! I work full time during the day and blog at night after my daughter, Haley, goes to bed and also on the weekends. Some nights I stay up way too late, because time just flies by so fast. Blogging has been a fun outlet and hobby but I’d love to have the time and resources to make my site so much more!

What type of work have you done prior to your website?

I was a business owner for 8 years. While I was in college (at nearly 30 years old) I provided accounting and bookkeeping services for small businesses as well as prepared taxes for individuals. I still do a few tax returns for clients who just can’t let me go. I love it! I currently work full time as an executive assistant.

I know you have a beautiful 7-year-old daughter. Do you think your blog has helped you become a better parent? How so?

It really has helped. I think that for me it’s the “journaling” part of blogging that has inspired me to be a better parent. It gives me the time and opportunity to reflect on how blessed I am. Blogging requires me to think about what would be best for my family and others. I enjoy sharing stories about Haley and our family with my readers as well as hearing about theirs.

What is it like reviewing all those products?

It’s awesome but can sometimes be overwhelming. I know…who would think that it would be overwhelming? I feel that I have an obligation to my readers to present them with products that are great for their families so I always have to keep that in mind. I also have an obligation to the companies to help them in any way that I can.

How did you get interested in charities?

My grandparents taught me many great values including the pure joy of giving. They always lived a modest lifestyle. Everything that they own has been immaculately cared for, and the only time they ever splurged on themselves was on vacations a few times per year. They have given so much to their church, the community, friends and family. They are so grateful for all they have, and they generously want to share with those in need. As a matter of fact, I remember many years ago when my grandfather retired. He didn’t know what to do with his time and missed work so much that he decided to go back to work for the business part time. He gave away every penny he earned, because he simply didn’t need the money. What I respect most is that with all of the years of giving I never once heard my grandparents boast or even hint about their generosity, nor have their deeds ever been advertised. They never wanted a pat on the back or any recognition, because they know the true blessing is in the giving. That’s what inspires me.

How are your grandparents doing now?

My grandfather has suffered from Alzheimer’s for nearly 11 years, and my grandmother has devoted her time to caring for him at home. They have nurses come in throughout the day to help. It breaks my heart that she has had to watch her husband deteriorate through the years, but she stands strong by his side and refuses to put him in a nursing home. She’s such a strong woman who is filled with dedication. She’s my hero!

How do you and your site support charities and charitable companies?

I try to give them as much exposure as possible on my site, such as extra ad space  (gift guides, side bar buttons, etc.) at no charge for an extended period of time. I have helped raise money for the Gal To Gal Foundation, which supports women with breast cancer, on my site but have not been approached by any other charities for fundraising. On All American Mommy you’ll find some gifts that “give back” or special promotional products where a percentage of the sales from an item goes to a particular charity.

Your commitment to help others really gives your blog a commendable purpose.

I’ve been able to experience the blessing of giving myself and it’s a wonderful feeling! My passion is to take what I’ve learned and use it to help others. Helping others and giving is just a part of my personality and the way I was raised. You don’t need money to give – give of yourself, give your time, think outside of yourself and you’ll feel great about doing it!

What are your requirements for supporting companies that support their communities?

None really. If they’re doing something great within the community I want to share it with the world!

I noticed that you have written about domestic violence on your website. What advice would you give to a woman who is currently experiencing the terror of domestic violence and does not know where to turn?

Get out now! Seek help wherever you can find it, and use the resources available to you. The internet is a great place to start! Seek the help of a friend or local organization that can get you into a safe living environment and help you get back on your feet. Check out this website for assistance.

Are there any other charities near and dear to your heart?

LOVE Inc. Churches get together and network as affiliates in a most inspiring outreach program. This organization is so willing to help those in need all over the US that they will not turn anyone away who seeks help. They also provide references for other services available within the community.

Since you have told us that blogging does not provide you with enough financial support to be a full time job, what would be your ideal career?

It has always been my passion to be part of something that is meaningful. I would love to work for a company or a charity that is doing something for the greater good of their community and helping people who really need it! Being a business owner in the past, I don’t want to work for a company that only cares about the bottom line. Helping others is what I enjoy doing most, and that’s where All America Mommy is leading me.

It is such a pleasure to see and hear about what moms all across America are doing to make the world a better place. Tonia, thank you so much for taking the time to share your mission with us. Any organization out there that has your support is so fortunate! And any moms reading this, who may be considering starting a blog, will certainly be inspired by the information you shared with us today.

Please visit Tonia’s website, All American Mommy, by clicking here. Tonia McAllister can be reach via email at allamericanmommy@gmail.com.

A while back, Kristina Daniele from www.momontherise.com reviewed Lilly Badilly, and we have stayed in touch. Recently she became the Chief Editor of Yonkerskids.com, part of the US Family Guide network. If you are not familiar with this guide, you’ve got to check it out! With over 400 web sites reaching parents in all states, major cities, www.usfamilyguide.com is America’s Family Network. This network provides a feature packed, customized system reaching millions of parents at a very low cost. On the site you’ll find coupons for just about everything, specific community info for parents, extensive travel info, camp guides, birthday party ideas, restaurants for kids, national attractions and a ton more.

While Yonkerskids.com is a local guide for the Lower Westchester, NY area, businesses can choose to market their product nationally by choosing to advertise in any number of other sites within the network. If you do online business, this is a great way to increase visibility for your products and services.

Kristina explained, “As an Editor, I regularly review businesses and services to include on the site. Not only will parents have access to your business, they will receive a review of your business from a Parent, Educator, and Marketing Professional.”

When it comes to parenting, no one can help you out more than Kristina! Please contact her at yonkersfamilyguide@gmail.com or call her at 914-613-3243 for more information. You may also follow her on twitter.

And if you just want to sign up on the site, please click here and Enter the referral code: YONK for special savings and discounts.

What is the most memorable lesson a teacher has ever taught you? One that you’ve used many times in your life? I am not talking about your 1st grade teacher who handed you “Dick and Jane” and then you began reading. I am referring to, well a life changing lesson, be it academic or otherwise.

I often think about a college professor I had at FSU. I am embarrassed to admit that I have no recollection of his name. But his words have stayed with me for well over 20 years. The students in my Short Story Writing Class received some exceptional writing direction when it came to character development. One day he said of my story, “You’ve got potential here, but I don’t know enough about your lead character. I mean, does this grumpy guy demand that his wife toasts his English muffins twice in the morning? And then does he make certain that the butter gets into every crevice of the English muffin’s craters before gobbling it up with his ill-fitting dentures and making a mess of crumbs all over the kitchen floor that his wife – not he- cleans up? These are things I need to know as a reader.”

For some reason, with this example, everything suddenly clicked. I realized I had been using characters in my stories without really developing them fully. I was describing with adjectives more than I was bringing them to life with specifics. So every time I write about a person (or millipede), I think about what I like to refer to as ‘The English Muffin Test.” What little quirky habits does this character have? What is her favorite novel? What strange habits might he have? And so on.

When I am asked to read what others have written, I often pass on the English Muffin Test to make my point. Yes, this does generate some puzzled looks, but on occasion I see an expression of “I get it now!” on the writer’s face.

I am forever grateful for the professor whose name I cannot recall.

My daughter had an epiphany yesterday. I showed her a photo album/scrap book I made for her Dad’s 30th birthday almost 17 years ago. She actually said, “Wow. Daddy had a life before me I never thought about.” When she saw my husband’s prom photo (circa 1979) in his brown tux with his ridiculous ruffled peach dress shirt, she laughed so hard she was crying.

It’s really coincidental that I came to that same realization about my parents when I was plowing through all my Mom’s old photos after she passed away. There were my Mom and Dad laughing and entertaining friends, all decked out in evening attire, traveling and having a good ol’ time WITHOUT me. They were Pauline and Ed. Not Mom and Dad. Why did it not ever occur to me before that they actually were alive and loving life before I was born? Am I that self absorbed? Maybe if I had looked at those photos a long time ago, I’d have gotten it a long time ago.

If you have some old photos of your life (and who doesn’t?) then share them with your kids now. Watch their faces light up as they discover your “other” life, or what I like to call “LBK,” Life Before Kids.

Since my work revolves around books, reading, writing and learning, I am privy to a lot of discussion about self-motivation and a child’s work ethic in school. It makes me wonder about how a parent can encourage a child to have an excellent work ethic. I have 2 theories abut this:

1. Parents who set a positive example will likely produce the same in their kids – Kids emulate what they see their role models (parents) do (not say) at home. Are you reliable? Do you follow through with everything you promise? Do you generally work hard and offer the most you have to give? Do you often go above and beyond the call of duty when offering your services at work, home or in volunteering? If you said yes to most or all of these questions, then your children are learning by your example. If, on the other hand, you mean well and are enthusiastic but don’t often follow through with your commitments, then your children see that as well. They will be equally as likely as you to follow through or not. So if you are setting a good work ethic example, you will have a better chance of producing offspring who will do the same.

2. Parents who do their children’s work produce offspring with a compromised work ethic – Parents who do EVERYTHING for their kids, can rightfully be said to have a good work ethic. However, their kids will not. Children need self-motivation and confidence in order to have a good work ethic. They will not achieve that as long as someone else is doing everything for them. Why do anything when you know it will be done for you? Take for example the parent who rifles through his or her child’s backpack every day after school, takes out the homework, and then forces the kid to sit down and get busy. This parent leans over the child’s shoulder correcting his worksheet and instructing him what to do next, controlling his every move. This type of parent means well. But what he or she is actually producing is a helpless offspring with low self esteem. Why on earth would a child like this have any motivation to work hard on his own? He knows that his Mom or Dad is going to criticize the work and change it anyway. He might as well just wait for instructions.

So the bottom line is that you need to demonstrate your own work ethic to your children. It is not something you can talk them through and demand from them. Plus you have to respect their independence and let them make their own mistakes. Reward them when they demonstrate discipline and excellence in their work at school and with other commitments. Refrain from doing things for them that they should be doing themselves.

We can only do our best and hope for the best in our kids.

There is no better feeling than that of Friday evening. The thought of school or work coming to an end for the week is very comforting. I always feel a deep sense of relief and relaxation when my daughter is home from school on Friday, and my husband walks in the door from work.I usually make a really nice dinner. In the winter we eat outside. (Of course, that’s when we have our best weather in Miami).

I have often wondered – What if there were no weekends? How horrible would that be? Very. And yet there are people who own businesses that essentially keep them working every day of the week. I work long hours, but mostly from my home office. Some people own or work at stores or restaurants and have to be there to welcome customers for extensive hours. I really appreciate those people and what they do to provide services for the rest of us while sacrificing their own free time.

So if you have weekends off, enjoy and appreciate them. Do somethig fun and relaxing. And spend time with the ones you love the most.

TGIF!